I guess I haven't posted in a while...I've just been taking some time to breathe and to focus on work and family and put some of the Sophia related anxiety aside for a bit...not that I don't miss her every single day, I do.
There have been a lot of good days lately. Last weekend we were in Divide at Mike's brothers, their neighbors have a little girl who was born a week after Sophia...it was fun to watch her and imagine what Sophia might be like at 19 months. The strangest things catch me, like when the kids were playing emergency with these toy defibrillator paddles...it made me so sad--I don't even know if they defribillated Sophia or not, but it is the same feeling I get if I hear a fire truck or ambulance siren in the morning. You just never know....you think you are fine and then...boom. However, it was a really good weekend. Mike and I got a night to ourselves (thanks Thom and Jodi) and went and stayed at a bed and breakfast in Cripple Creek for the night. The place is gorgeous and really quiet and I highly recommend you go...click the link above to see more.
Lately the toughest thing has been seeing people who don't know Sophie died. The other day I was leaving work late and the night security guard who I haven't seen in a long time asked me how the baby was doing, and then we met with our financial advisor this week and he didn't know...hopefully all those encounters will taper off. I'm thinking of changing dentists just because she always asks about the kids.
On the "Quest for Answers" side, we got some good news this week. There is a research group at North Carolina doing some research on PCD, which is linked to asplenia and could potentially explain Sophie's early breathing problems. A gentleman on the yahoo group is trying to determine if he has PCD and he put us in touch with the researchers. They are interested about learning more about Sophie's case, which makes us happy. Not that knowing whether she had PCD changes anything....but being able to learn more and the potential for her death to contribute to the knowledge base and maybe prevent future similar deaths is huge for us.
Side note---got a letter from Dear Abby (actually it was from Steve, but it was on Dear Abby stationery) apparently the whole thing is just a bizaare coincidence as the "Grieveing Mother" lives in Missouri and they verified her existence...
Lately the toughest thing has been seeing people who don't know Sophie died. The other day I was leaving work late and the night security guard who I haven't seen in a long time asked me how the baby was doing, and then we met with our financial advisor this week and he didn't know...hopefully all those encounters will taper off. I'm thinking of changing dentists just because she always asks about the kids.
On the "Quest for Answers" side, we got some good news this week. There is a research group at North Carolina doing some research on PCD, which is linked to asplenia and could potentially explain Sophie's early breathing problems. A gentleman on the yahoo group is trying to determine if he has PCD and he put us in touch with the researchers. They are interested about learning more about Sophie's case, which makes us happy. Not that knowing whether she had PCD changes anything....but being able to learn more and the potential for her death to contribute to the knowledge base and maybe prevent future similar deaths is huge for us.
Side note---got a letter from Dear Abby (actually it was from Steve, but it was on Dear Abby stationery) apparently the whole thing is just a bizaare coincidence as the "Grieveing Mother" lives in Missouri and they verified her existence...
